Post image for Bachelor Alum Jamie Otis Explains Why She Married At First Sight: “It’s hard to figure out if a guy is a good guy or not”

Bachelor Alum Jamie Otis Explains Why She Married At First Sight: “It’s hard to figure out if a guy is a good guy or not”

by Maryann Pisano on July 24, 2014

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The last time I spoke to you was right after you did Bachelor Pad.  So since then, what have you been up to?

Well, I live in New York and I’m a nurse at NewYork- Presbyterian.  I’ve been working.  I guess just living life!

How did you hear about the show Married at First Sight?  Why did you decide to do it?

[Producers] had called and asked if I was still single and if I would be interested in this new dating show.  I said, ‘oh sure.’  I had no idea that it meant I would be marrying somebody at first sight until final casting.  At that point, all of the experts were in the room and the executive producer was there.  [On the Denmark version of the show,] two of the three couples stay together.  It was so different than my experience on Bachelor and Bachelor Pad that I thought why not give this a shot?  I’ve always been very [afraid of commitment].  I thought that this would be a great opportunity for me because I don’t have parents [there to help me with my relationships].

What did your friends and family say when you told them that you were going to be on Married at First Sight?  Did they say you were crazy?  (laughs)

Yes!  (Laughs)  Well, my one sister said I was crazy.  But my other sister said, ‘Jamie, you’ll probably never get married if it’s not like this because you have such an issue with commitment.’

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Why do you think you have commitment issues?

Well when I was growing up, my step-dad beat my mom and choked her, and threatened her life with a gun.  When I started dating on my own, I told myself I wouldn’t tolerate anyone being abusive to me.  But, my first two boyfriends never physically punched me but they would lock me in rooms.  It wasn’t until I went to nursing school that I realized there’s a level of emotional abuse.  It’s hard to figure out if a guy is a good guy or not.

So what went through your mind when you first met your husband?

I knew I was getting married to a stranger.  I knew I would have the four experts to guide me.  I’ve never had that kind of support when dating someone.  When I put on my dress the day of the wedding I got cold feet!  It’s a scary, scary thing committing yourself to someone just based on scientific evidence.  When I was walking down the aisle, I wasn’t attracted to him.  I was hoping for chemistry and butterflies.  That didn’t happen.  I got really scared.  I feel like I got myself in a trap and I was stuck.  I was just really, really scared.  I just didn’t feel comfortable around him.  The first three impressions I felt were I wasn’t attracted to him, I felt uncomfortable around him, and I felt like I was stuck with him.  I thought I made the wrong choice.

How did you feel at the end of this past episode opening up to him?

I grew to care about him a lot.  Watching it back, it’s hurtful that I was so guarded.  It comes off as rejection.  It’s tough to see.  I would never want to hurt someone that I care about.  I think that he’s such a confident guy.  To me, that’s such an attractive trait.

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Obviously, he was very attracted to you.

Yes, he was definitely attracted to me.  He said that I was exactly who he wanted to see walking down the aisle.  That was so sweet.

Did he know you from The Bachelor?

No, he didn’t!  But, someone in his family did.  It wasn’t a secret at our wedding.

What can viewers expect from future episodes?

Just an honest portrayal of what we went through.  From me being super closed off to fully realizing he’s a great guy.  Whether or not I fall in love with him, I learn that I can trust him and rely on him.  He’s got great qualities.

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How has The Bachelor community responded?

Everyone has been so supportive of me and my journey and experience.  They’re such a family.  They always stick together.  They’re so warm towards me.  Also, The Bachelor, for me, was never realistic.  You have to be a very confident person to go on The Bachelor.  For Married at First Sight, it’s just a much more serious show.  You are committing your life to someone and hoping that it lasts.  It’s a very different experience than The BachelorThe Bachelor is: travel, have fun, make friends, make enemies, drink a lot.  Married at First Sight is you go on your honeymoon, but then you come home and have a normal life with them and try to make this marriage work.

{ 1 comment… read it below or add one }

S. Joe July 30, 2014 at 2:23 pm

I think this couple is going to make it. I like how they took their time to learn one another. I think Jamie’s “reserve” kept him hooked. She hung in there, and so did he, in spite of being rejected at first.

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