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Relationship Blogger Jenni Rizzo Tells Emme Readers It’s Okay to Be Single for the Holidays

by Maryann Pisano on December 7, 2014


In Case You Didn’t Know: It’s Totally OK to be Single for The Holidays

Thanksgiving is over and Starbucks crème brulee lattes are available. Single girls everywhere, get ready. The holidays are here. It’s the time of year that so many single girls dread and when it feels like your singleness is under even more scrutiny.

Because the Internet knows everything about me, including the fact that I’m single, I’ve recently been flooded with a ton more ads for dating sites and articles that companies think I’d be interested in. The articles have titles like, “Single Girls Guide to Surviving the Holidays” or “How to Resist Calling Your Ex on Christmas.”

Geez everyone. Relax. It’s Christmas. I’m not sure what I need to survive. I get it. Every girl has these visions of running around in the snow and kissing someone while on ice skates or something. We think that’s what we’re supposed to do during this time because that’s what happens in the movies. But life isn’t a movie and we live in Chicago and it’s f*ing cold. Stay inside.

I will be ok, and so will you. I promise.  Here’s why:

Being alone and feeling lonely are two different things. I actually feel least lonely around the holidays because I spend so much time around my family and friends. The holidays leave little time to be by yourself, so enjoy the moments that you’re spending with some of the most important people in your life.

I was curious to see what some of these survival articles had to say, so read through a few of them. According to most, the biggest “benefit” to being single during the holidays is not having to deal with the stress associated with meeting someone’s family or searching for the perfect gift. Come on. Those aren’t great reasons, especially if you’re like me and really, really enjoy shopping for men’s clothes. My Saks card gets more use in the men’s department than anywhere else in the store. They have the best t-shirts and oversized hoodies there, FYI.

Ok, so here’s my thinking: if you have someone, great. But if not, the holidays shouldn’t throw you into a weird depression. There’s no reason to get sad because there really are some real perks to being single during the holidays. I swear.


  • You can actually just relax. Take a breath and look around. People are everywhere, kids are screaming, your siblings are shuttling back and forth between in-laws houses. You on the other hand can just sit back and eat another mini cheesecake cup because you’re already exactly where you need to be.


  • You get to enjoy a nice, quiet sleep in your bedroom at your parent’s house. Plus, when you wake up, they’ll have coffee waiting and will likely offer to make you anything that you want for breakfast. It’s like the best free hotel in the world!


  • You get more time to solidify your position as best aunt ever. If you brought a date with you, chances are that you wouldn’t be able to have a sleepover and teach your nephew how to delete his text messages when his parents go to bed. I might have done that last year on Christmas. Oops.


  • You seriously can eat as many helpings of mashed potatoes as you want. Enough said. Keep going, you have nobody to impress.


  • You can wear leggings and a t-shirt and throw your hair in a ponytail. You don’t have to put mascara on either because it’s your family and they are already well aware of what you look like. It doesn’t matter. You also know the audience and know that there’s no chance that your soul-mate is going to walk through the door, so you’re in the clear.


  • If your family is like mine, you won’t have to explain why those loud Italians just keep screaming at each other. The house is never quiet. Ever. Everyone talks extra loud but they aren’t fighting. It takes a bit of getting used to for people that don’t know that.


  • You can take an after dinner nap. After dinner naps are one of the best parts about the holidays. Because you’re not obligated to “entertain” anybody, it’s so much easier to sneak away and take a nap because nobody is really looking for you.

Now I’m not crazy and suggesting that it’s better to be single than in a relationship for the holidays. I do think that people should stop stressing so much and enjoy the time that they’re spending with some of the most special people in their life. I know that sounds super cheesy, but being single doesn’t mean that you don’t have a million other people in your life that care about you. Pay some attention to them. And more importantly, pay attention to yourself. There’s no better time of year to spend time with the person you should love the most: Yourself.

So, stop feeling sorry for yourself. Go to Starbucks, get a coffee and take yourself to see some Christmas lights. You’d be surprised at how much fun you can have. I was! If doing something in public solo isn’t your thing, put on Home Alone, light a pine scented candle, order some food, hope for a cute Grub Hub delivery guy and wait the season out. You’ve got this. ::fist bump::

To the Point: The best gift you can give yourself this holiday season is the gift of not giving a shit about your love life and enjoying every moment.

Jenni Rizzo is the founder of is a “collection of stories and random thoughts inspired by life as a 20-something girl trying to find something much, much better than just fine in Chicago.”

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